contemplations of mr. charles

raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittensbright copper kettles and warm woolen mittens brown paper packages tied up with strings these are a few of my favorite things

cream colored ponies and crisp apple streudels doorbells and sleigh bells and schnitzel with noodles wild geese that fly with the moon on their wings these are a few of my favorite things

...

well, you know what's NOT one of my favorite things...?

"brown paper packages tied up with strings" that have nothing to do with me.

mom and dad have been bringing a lot of new things into the house lately and you know what?  none of it is for me!  none of my favorite things!  no chicken.  no treats.  no prosciutto [that's right, i like my bacon fancy].  nada.  zilch.  and even when they do bring home a little toy, it turns out, it isn't for me!  can you believe it?  what is going on!?  they keep saying things like "for baby" and "elinor is coming".  fine.  but, where are my presents?

and would you take a look at this contraption?

what the...?

will someone please tell me what am i supposed to do with that thing?

dad won't let me climb in it.

mom doesn't like when i sneeze at it.

i am pretty sure i won't be allowed to nibble on it.

what kind of toy is that?

they brought it in the house, dad fiddled with it for a bit, mom looked at some booklet thingy, and then they took it out where the cars live.  are they just messing with me now?  and does it get to go for a ride in the car without me.  things just keep getting worse for me.

i am not sure how i feel about all of this.  hopefully this "elinor" that they keep saying is coming soon will make things better.  maybe all these other things are the lame gifts for my parents to play with and this "elinor" will be for me!  something that i can play with finally.  my parents seem to think she will be pretty great.  they get really excited when they talk about her.  well, let me tell you folks, i get dibs on the good present.  this "elinor" is mine.  she will be my buddy.  you can keep your strange black contraption and all of those fabric items with the snaps. onesies, i think you call them?  what kind of a name is "onesie" anyway?  fine.  you keep your "onesie".  i will take the "elinor".