dear peanut

hi baby girl.  it seems like all is well with you which i am so grateful for.  your mama is doing her best to not melt in the summer sun.  for some reason, this past week has been especially brutal.  i have been chugging water to keep us hydrated and cranking the AC and fans whenever possible.  you don't seem to be having an adverse reaction to the summer sun which bodes well for you, my dear.  on a very happy note...my sleeping has improved.  wahoo!  perhaps it is all the perspiration during the day... i dunno.  but, i am one happy camper.  i have been able to fall asleep effortlessly and enjoy a whole night of undisturbed slumber.  i am savoring these moments.

in other news, we are nearing the completion of your room.  i am fighting my nesting urge to just get it all done because i want to spread it out and savor each part.  the checklist is getting smaller which means that you will be here soon.  i can't believe that you will be sleeping [yes, sleeping] in your crib in less than three months!  time is really flying now and we are sooo excited.

sometimes, the magnitude of it all just washes over me and i feel a little overwhelmed.  overcome with joy, yes.  but i also battle that twinge of fear that tries to occasionally creep in and steal my joy.  fear of labor.  complications.  health issues.  no sleep.  breast-feeding.  new things.  the unknown.  sleep schedules.  stroller mechanics.  baby cpr.  being responsible for a new and delicate life.  wow.  i mean, this is foreign territory.  and i want to do it well.  and that is why i have been doing a lot of praying.  i want to be calm and at peace.  resting securely and knowing that my Heavenly Father is in control.  he has numbered the hairs on your head.  he has ordained your days.  he is knitting you together.  and he will hold us in his hands.  i know that this will be a wonderful and challenging season for me and your papa.  we are going to trust God like never before.  and, we look forward to his revealing himself like never before.  here's to a new adventure as a family of three.

all our love to you, little peanut.

love, your mama + your papa